August 5, 2013

{WANDERLUST} St. Tropez Versus Self Esteem

This summer, I joined my family on a trip to the South of France. As it approached, everything about the trip gave me anxiety. I was comfortable in Paris, having the privilege of visiting many times before, but there was something about the South of France, and especially the coastal towns of Cannes and St. Tropez and Antibes, that absolutely intimidated me. Continue...

Confidence is not necessarily something I struggle with. I operate in circles and in worlds that span in diversity across every sector, seamlessly and effortlessly. I tend to get along with most people I interact with (barring  an acquaintance's conservative politics, of course; in that case we just have to agree to disagree). I am comfortable in nearly all manners of dress - from the scantily clad to the ball gown. I love cities, I love the ocean, I love beautiful landscapes. And yet, there was something about getting on a plane and heading to the South of France, admittedly, something many people only dream of, that rattled me.

It's not often that I feel overcome with any sense of low confidence. Maybe, by the 6th day of New York Fashion Week, when yet another PR intern has been brusque, not realizing that I am, in fact, meant to be there - and the seat assignment isn't wrong, either.  Even then, the feelings are fleeting. But every facet of the trip made me nervous. I had so much work to do, would I be able to do it? What will I wear? Where's my favorite bikini? Am I overpacking? What will I wear? Is this appropriate? Does it look "expensive"? Do I look expensive? Do I need to look expensive? It's Cannes, of course. Or not of course. Or I thought of course. What does it even mean to look expensive, when you're certainly not decked out in high-end resort wear? I thought I loved this bikini, but do I South-of-France-Love-This-Bikini?

Sigh. Then I got there and realized I was being an idiot and a bit of a drama queen. No one cared what I wore, or what anyone wore, for that matter. No one cared about my appearance or about my body or about my bikini (which yes, I most certainly wore throughout the trip). All anyone cared about was relaxing, enjoying the scenery, and devouring a steaming pot of fresh mussels, oozing with white wine and cream and shallots. And the moment I realized that, I could join in and do the same, too.



We spent the day in St. Tropez, after taking a ferry for about an hour from the Port of Cannes. The journey itself is breathtaking, if not a bit cold. The fog broke as we made it closer towards St. Tropez, revealing seaside hills punctuated by terracotta villas and lush greenery. It was beautiful, and breathtaking, and so much less about Hermes and Flat Tummies than I had ever, ever anticipated. 

30 comments:

  1. It's so refreshing to hear this. We all, at some level, have self-esteem issues. We want to fit in, to look like we belong, and being in a new situation and new space there's some amount of dis-ease. Thanks for sharing!

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  2. These pictures are absolutely stunning!!!

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  3. Love this post Nicolette. :)

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  4. Wow. You had me at the candy! :) My dream is to retire to the South of France, so this is good news that I don't have to try and squeeze into a Chanel wardrobe by the time I hit 65. :)

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  5. Love this post, Nicolette. I think so many of us can relate to it!

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  6. Wonderful post and beautiful pictures! Xx

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  7. I've also had those anxieties as well. I feel like this is a really relate-able post for a lot of women. It looks like a great and beautiful trip!

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  8. Wow. I was just obsessing (much) over something so random and thought to myself "I wonder if NM or GabiFresh obsess over such nonsense"? Thank you for sharing! I feel good knowing I am not alone! Enjoy your travels for those of us state-side!

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  9. Kelsey@HellosimplemeAugust 5, 2013 at 10:15 PM

    This looks so incredible! I'm going to Paris next May and am super excited! Wonderful Photos! :D

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  10. This just goes to show we all have those days where our self-esteem seems nowhere to be found. It's normal to go through these lulls, as long as we don't make it the norm. Thanks for sharing this with us, Nicolette. :)


    Abi
    http://thebelatedbloomer.blogspot.com

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  11. Right here is the right blog for anyone who wants to understand this
    topic. You realize so much its almost hard to argue with you (not that I personally will need to…HaHa).

    You definitely put a new spin on a subject which has been discussed for many years.
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    My weblog; Mississauga Soccer

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  12. the south of france is one of my favorite holiday destinations ever! i have spent every summer of my childhood years in the south of france, most of the time in the ardeche or provence! i could not get enough of the lavender and the crickets and the small little creeks where we would go for a swim! in love with the fauna and flora! my dad took his motor bike with him and we drove to st tropez or monaco every now and then! i definitely remember the yachts! http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0058135/ you should check out this movie about st tropez

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  13. I would have felt the same... there are scary places and I'm not talking about security at night or dark places... Last February I attended fashion week in Paris for the first time and I felt über intimidated. But then I realize I was there with my wife to have a great time, take some photos and eat at our favourite places while enjoying the best fashion in the world. And I had a blast!
    Gorgeous pics, by the way!
    xx,
    E.
    www.theslowpace.com

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  14. Yup! I'm just human, and we all have our "off" days." I hope you're feeling better <3

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  15. Thank you Allie!! Trying to open up more.

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  16. Absolutely. All we can do is give our best in every situation!

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  17. That amount of perspective is so important!

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  18. that sounds so idyllic! I can't imagine growing up so close to so much natural beauty. xx

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  19. thanks for commenting! <3 it's all true.

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  20. yay! paris is one of the most beautiful cities in the world. you're going to have the time of your life :)

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  21. i think, and hope, this is something all women can relate to on some level.
    do you think anna wintour feels this? ever?

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  22. oh, i can't imagine a more beautiful place to retire. still close to towns and cities, but so entirely idyllic.

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  23. I'm so envious - of your trip, of your self-confidence, and of your ability to push through the anxiety to enjoy your gorgeous surroundings!

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  24. Kelsey@HellosimplemeAugust 7, 2013 at 11:18 PM

    I sure hope so! I'm going with my Fashion Merchandising Major so the majority of our stops and tours will be fashion related! ;)

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  25. I'm off to Mexico soon and my whole pre holiday run down is blighted with worries! Am I to fat for Mexico! I have gone as far as googling fat people Mexico! I've scanned every resort photo for a mere sign of a fellow fat lady anxiety is building to fever pitch! This post has some what settled my fear I don't want my holiday to be about being fat In Mexico I want it to be about being fabulous in Mexico!

    Sorry for the overuse of Mexico in this comment I swear I'm not bragging! I'm literally typing every irrational fear down which is helping me! I sound so stupid even saying this shit I know I do but I can't shift this worry!

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  26. Stunning photos, and great post.
    It's hard to be 100% confident all the time. That's what makes us human. Thank you for sharing that you, too, are human!

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  27. On Friday I am going to the South of France and will be staying half an hour from St Tropez so this post really caught my eye. When I started reading this I was thinking, oh gosh maybe I should be worrying about all these things too (haha) but I'm pleased to hear that your worries weren't justified! :) The pics are beautiful and now I cannot wait for my trip! Thanks :)

    Hailes<3

    Click here to check
    out my blog – Hailes Hearts Fashion

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